The USS Quad Damage

Ye Olde Economy

I’ve never understood how you were meant to do your day-to-day activities when nothing is open outside of business hours. During business hours, isn’t everyone supposed to be working? I’ve never understood why I can’t do _consumeristic_stuff at midnight on a Sunday. The only way to do this stuff is if you don’t have a job, or if it is your job to do this stuff, or if you take time off work somehow.

I like internet banking, because I don’t want to stand in line waiting to hear some noob telling me I can’t do whatever it is I wanted to. Cheques are shit. It means I have to wait in line to have some noob telling me I can’t extract that money. I don’t even know what line to wait in, and there’s some assumption that everyone knows what you gotta do with cheques. It’s like getting an LP today. WTF are you supposed to do with that shit?

First I went to the post office, where she looked at me like I was asking for ear-sex. She quickly said “We don't do that sort of thing here”, anxiously looking around, and stopped making eye contact. I’m pretty sure the post office did. In the seedy underbelly of Campbelltown, I’m sure I remember getting a Cheque into my bank account, but it seems Chatswood was too good for me. She recommended I go to the bank, where I could get myself “serviced”.

The bank made me want to vomit. No instructions or anything. You walk around feeling awkward until you get to the far back of the bank, where the tellers are. The tellers told me to fill out a deposit slip, which was completely nonsensical. It wasn’t until I noticed that instructions for filling that thing out were on the table which I was filling the deposit slip out on that I realised that I’d probably filled it in wrong. Hell, it was asking for all sorts of weird information which was not present on the cheque.

I filled in whatever I could, and after all that, you know what he told me? He told me to go to another bank, because even though the cheque’s got his bank’s name on it, I gotta go to the bank which I’m transferring to. By this time that bank had closed.

When I am king they will be first against the wall.