The USS Quad Damage

It’s about me filling my sails, stroking my ego, or talking out of my arse, if you will. It looks like the italians have messed up for good. Along with making my blog unreadable, jabber.linux.it have pretty much sapped the energy of blogging from the entire posse' of fellow bloggers, most notably the ones I know in real life. Camel's blog being an interesting blog which hasn't seen any action since april, and Raptor's refreshingly jaded blog which, similarly, hasn't been updated in a while.

I'm not claiming I was the driving force behind these blogs. On the contrary, the inspiration for my venture into blogdom came from these very blogs. Yeah, that's right, I said "blogdom". It's like a "blogosphere", except less retarded. Anyway, I'm not saying that I was the driving force behind these blogs, but my constant ranting could have revitalised them somewhat.

That's not what this article / blog / thing is about though. It's about me filling my sails, stroking my ego, or talking out of my arse, if you will. You see, I went out with some uni friends on friday. One of them was a friend of a friend. Someone I'd known about, but never met. This person happened to have read my website and all the stuff I'd put in it, and it's what he said about it that's left me so chuffed.

To explain a little about this "website", I'd like to take you... into the past (best to read that whilst your orchestra plays dreamy harps). Imagine me a little younger, a little happier, and a little bit... fatter (best to read that whilst your orchestra plays a trombone). OK, so imagine me eating doritos and typing up PHP code using my greasy fingers. I designed websites. I don't know why. Maybe I had nothing better to do, maybe I thought it was fun, maybe I thought I'd eventually put content on them.

I never DID put content on them though, that was the thing. I'd design one, then before I'd ever write anything, I'd design a different one -- a better one! In order to test my site, though, I'd accrue these "junk" articles. Stuff I wrote just because it was composed of words. Basically just ranting (a lot like what I'm doing now). I could test out the way things looked, the design, etc.

So now we're back to uni friends, and this guy said something to make me feel fundamentally better about myself. First, he said he read my site. No biggie, a lot of people get bored and read friends' sites and it's not impossible for that to happen. Second, he said he thought the articles were pretty wierd / wacky / funny. Again, no biggie -- they're rants, they're supposed to be wacky, and I've heard they're funny from others. It's ego-inflating, but I'd heard this before, up to this point. A few well placed jokes aren't enough to make me think I'm great.

The third thing he said, though, was a phenomenal compliment. He said "your stuff could be in on of those PC magazines" (immediate ego explosion). Let's take that frame by frame: My stuff, which was effectively ill thought out ranting, was of a quality that could be in published in technical journalism (best to read that whilst your choir sings their praisees to the lord). OK, so technical journalism isn't the pinnacle of written creativity, but I'm an engineer. I'm glad I can spell, much less be published in technical journalism (choir again!).

Let's reiterate: This guy wasn't saying that my stuff was goofy or crazy or funny, but that the quality of my writing was of such a calibre that actual humans would not only enjoy reading it, but would go so far as to pay for the privilege (assuming I was saying something interesting). That's one big compliment. Understandably, he wasn't a great writer or critic, he was just a guy, an engineer at that, but even the suggestion is mind altering.

I was never good at english in high school. All the english teachers hated me. They'd read my essays and have a look of shock and dismay on their faces, as if I'd just raped and mutilated kittens (best to read that whilst your orchestra rapes and mutilates kittens). This is a complete slap in the face of that, and I like it.

So I've been thinking I might start blogging again. Maybe someone out there thinks it's good enough to read. Maybe the guy was just being nice, but I think it doesn't really matter anyway. I was probably happy because it was something I like doing, and someone encouraged me along that path. Even if it just gets Camel writing again, it'll be worth it.

Man that was a soppy ending. Maybe I should just add that those fucking italians should get the fuck off their arse and fix their fucking blog client. Why is convenience always marred with bad service. Is everyone out to be a dick or is it something they can't help?

better.